As time goes by

So much has happened the last year of my life and so many stories to be told. But what I have really thought about the last four months are the stories not told or the stories that suddenly ended.
The last year has been like a rollercoaster ride with all the ups and downs.
I met the most fantastic man last year and everything went really fast. In the beginning we took it really slow. We were both just out of relationships and just wanted to have some fun. It turned out to be the best and the worst time of my life – so far.
He was amazing and we were perfect together. He made me laugh, he believed in me and the love we had and we had big plans for the future. I went to visit his family in New Zealand which has become like my second home now and I met some really awesome people. We moved in together and we lived together for three months. We made plans for the future, what we wanted to do with our lives, talked about children and where we wanted to live and raise our kids. But in the end the only thing that was important he said was that we were together. And for the first time in my life I understood the people who says that a partner you love makes you complete. We were perfect with all our flaws.
He died two weeks after we came home from New Zealand. January 26th 2008. He was only 31. My world fell apart and everything that we had planned was no more. I had to go back to New Zealand to the funeral less then 4 weeks after we left it together. This time it was without him.

Everyday I miss him and I would never want my worst enemy to experience my pain.
As time goes by I realise that I have to find a beginning to my new story and somehow find The End of Reuben and my story but because he was my greatest love and now he is gone I feel like I’m missing some chapters that would complete the story. Maybe I have to leave that story untold.